Can we choose who we forgive?

Jesus says to his followers to forgive. That's it. Forgive. There's no small print there, no secondary clauses that might have us pause... no adverb to support his command besides, perhaps, "freely".

So what makes us think we can choose who we forgive? My family is notorious for holding grudges. Except for maybe my dad, who lets everything roll off like water off a duck's back. But everyone else holds grudges like you wouldn't believe. "I just can't forgive her for doing that to me. I still feel betrayed." I've heard this a lot from my sis since moving in with her this summer. She is starting to loathe her job and especially her relationship with her coworkers. She's let some potentially hurtful situations rule her perspective and of course, she feels like the victim in every case. I've asked her why her coworkers seem to be "out to get her" as she puts it, and always her response is an "I dunno. I don't understand why!" And of course she is %100 certain that all her rude coworkers are hurtful to her on purpose. She's still holding grudges for happenings from months ago...

She won't forget the things that turned her against them and neither will she forgive them, unless they come to her and apologize or do something else utterly redemptive. The point is that they don't deserve forgiveness. They don't do anything that would merit your forgiveness. It's freely letting go of your right to judge them. It doesn't make sense, right? But the world would definitely be a better place with it.

I think free forgiveness - no catches, no glitches, no ultimatums - should be upheld even outside of Jesus' remarks. And I know I'm not the first person to remark on this issue of forgiveness but this is at least the dozenth rant I've heard from my sis about her job and this needed to get out somehow...