Sensitive.

I just finished watching "The Notebook" for the very first time. I know, I know... it's been 5+ years since it came out. I guess I've been repulsed by the idea of sitting down for a full 2 hours to watch the sappiest love story since Tristan and Isolde after witnessing my entire senior class sob and fall apart to pieces at the mere mention of 'Noah'. I once knew a girl that watched it everyday in our Yearbook class, covered her Myspace in photos of the two starlets embracing, and would quote it at least a few times a day. It really turned me off to rowboats and nursing homes.

Fast-forward a few years and almost an entire bachelors degree, and on a calm Saturday afternoon I find myself flipping channels in my room, munching on my favorite apple and peanut butter, and there it is. I could have been doing a few other things - like starting on my Senior Seminar paper or heading down to the gym - but the moment I saw that it was on and that it had just started, I had to sit and watch. It was like an involuntary compulsion... and as I watched I cried. And cried. And then the two main characters died in each others arms and I cried for a solid 5 minutes. I wondered why I'd allowed myself to miss such a waterfall of a gem for so long.

All this comes to a slight realization that I am overly sensitive. I have to admit, maybe I'm getting ahead of myself. Didn't tons of people sob at this movie? Wouldn't I basically be heartless if I didn't? But then, it's not just this movie. It's every WWF commercial I see, every story I read on CNN about bombings in Gaza or downed airplanes. It's all the times my friends don't return my text messages or IMs. It's living off campus for the first time... like everything in my life, I could glorify God with this particular characteristic of mine or I could let it fuel my sinfulness. Lately it's been the latter, whether it's the building up of bitter or lonely thoughts that distract me from God's everlasting companionship, or letting my feelings get pent up to the point that I lash out in anger.

But I'm glad this has been brought to my attention; a new post-it to remind me that I have a choice to glorify and praise God with my sensitivity and overactive frontal lobe could go a long way...

- Alicia